Do It Yourself....

I recall seeing two old farmers in the Jack & Jill store in Bismarck years ago. Their cart was empty save for some big cans of Welch's grape juice (not frozen, just plain juice), a bag of sugar, and a few packages of yeast.  It didn't take a brain surgeon to realize they were going to make wine with all of that.

Thus, here's a handy little video to show you how they might have done it.  You can make white wine, too....just use white grape juice. The white wine recipe calls for using champagne yeast, but Whole Foods has some good German yeast that might work just fine.  And here's a link to the WikiHOW article.

We made our own red wine once--gallons of it from all the red grapes that grew in the Missouri river bottomland south of town. That wild grape variety has the worst reputation among home wine makers, but we forged ahead. Peggy and Sally were just tots, but they went along on the grape picking venture with our friends the Bergers and all their ambulant kiddies.  Katie and Tom had not arrived on the planet.

The process was more complicated than the video shows: we had to squeeze the grapes and mix it with the sugar and yeast in a big ceramic crock until it was ready to sit in the fermenting containers--big glass jugs obtained from the Big Boy restaurant east of town. We kept it downstairs next to the furnace while it fermented, and it produced a LOT of wine.  We bottled some of it, but we left most of it right in the glass jugs. I gave a bottle to my parents, and we threw away the rest when we moved out of that house to the log house.

It was pretty raw, and besides, nobody was into wine in those days. It was several decades before restaurants began having wine lists.

Anyway, my parents took the bottle of wine home and put it in the cabinet over their refrigerator. And there it sat for a few years.  When my mother had a heart attack, I went down to visit her and stay with Dad. I decided to make Shrimp Newburg for lunch one day, and I needed some wine. I remembered the wine over the fridge, so I got it out, opened it, took a sip....and whoa....it had lost all of its raw edges and was clear and beautiful. So that's what happens when you age a good wine! Alas, there was no more around after that bottle was gone.  C'est la vie....

Monday musings

my dreams have been most enjoyable of late. last week i dreamt about my art, and last night, i dreamt one of my kids came to visit me. they don't, usually. so it was a nice surprise. then i woke up. hot and sneezing. couldn't open the window, had no kleenex. so i got up, took a shower, and got dressed for the day.

two weeks ago, i found my grandpa's billfold. it still has the photo of my grandma in it. i never met either of them. but i know she could sing and play the piano, and he both provided and cooked the meat (usually wild game) for supper every night--he said she had enough to do taking care of their seven children without a lot of feather plucking or skinning on top of it. when there was no pheasant or duck or fish, he'd go out and shoot a few squirrels or rabbits. his billfold used to have a receipt from the grocery store in it, too. that's gone. don't know where.

In Which We Attend a Tax Day Tea Bag Event...

[Volunteers wearing day-glo shirts and caps in front of the Tea Bag enclosure in the background]

Yesterday, April 15, was "Tax Day," and the furious tea baggers were out in force here in the City of Satan. Well, there were several hundred, maybe even close to a thousand. The WaPo, ever eager to inflate the opposition to a legally elected Democratic President, said it was "thousands." The paper enthused that "more than 50 tour buses" poured into DC for the event. When was the last time YOU were on a tour bus? Did you count the seats? You do the math.

Anyhoo, on the same slope by the Washington Monument that had been COVERED, elbow to elbow, with protesters during one of the antiwar gatherings during the Bush 2 administration, the tea baggers gathered in a fenced-in area. Inside of this, the speakers' platform was set up so that--the cameras not being able to see the empty space behind--it might actually look crowded. Two park police were out by the sidewalk near Constitution Avenue (in full sight of the traffic) trying to manage their fidgety horses. By the time we left at 7 p.m., there were FOUR cavalry waiting to run down troublemakers--which apparently were both of us old girls plus a bunch of very young folks.

It was pretty evident just who was there. Take a look at the photos. Tell me if I'm wrong when I say that I perceived most of these people to be older, white, and lower middle-class.  About half a dozen nonwhite persons were there, but they were selling flags and buttons and t-shirts in an effort to capitalize on the market.

Yes, they had their hateful buttons and signs, but this time they were mostly manufactured, not hand-made, and all meticulously spelled!!  But boy, were they pissed off! One older gentleman refused to read my little handout ("Thank you, Obama, for these tax cuts!" followed by a listing of all the tax cuts us little folks (i.e., taxpayers) have received this year.) "Nah....I've been workin since I was 10 years old and I never took a penny from anyone, and I got 17 children and...." at which point, he turned and stomped away.  I called "Thanks for your good example and hard work!" But he didn't turn around.  And I got to thinking...17 kids!  I wonder if he's my cousin!! I should have asked him if he was from South Dakota.

Tax Day 2010

Today, April 15, used to be the most exciting day of the year--the day I drove past the Minneapolis Post Office at a little before midnight to drop our tax return into a bag held by one of many postal employees out front. The postal employees wore vests with reflective tape, warm hats (it was only April, after all), and carried flashlights to help our aim in the dark. Tout le monde, it seemed, was out there dropping off tax returns. Police officers directed traffic so the lines moved along without tieups. It was an event! The only other event that came close was Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve. That, too, took place around midnight, and it also gave us the same feeling of sauves par le gong.

And then we discovered accountants. Even though we had to pay $100 for an accountant back then (out of a total income of less than 5 figures), we always got that $100 investment back and more when tax refund time rolled around. No matter how scrupulous I was at counting every possible deduction, the accountants always knew more and better.

Years passed, and I moved to one of the five boroughs of NYC. I was divorced by then and my income had climbed to the low five figures, though I also had quit recently to go to grad school. (That was retirement #2--you could cut a pretty good deal if your employer a) had a good investment plan for its employees, or b) wanted to cut down the number of employees, or c) both.) But back to the borough...walking down the main street to the wonderful, enchanting bookstore (and no, I'll never buy a kindle...you'll have to pry my book out of my cold, dead hands), I'd pass an accountant's storefront shop.

One day in the end of January after my W2 form had arrived for the previous year, I walked past the accountant's and thought, "What the heck?" I walked in, talked with the accountant, who was sitting right there at a desk, and went home to get my W2. The accountant had all the other forms right there. I returned, handed over the goods, and got a quote for the accountant's work in preparing and filing my taxes: $75! And I would get several thousand back!! What was not to like?

I'm still using that blessed accountant. He files my taxes electronically now, and any returns--state and federal--appear in my checking account in less than two weeks!! This is all accomplished usually by what we used to call in the convent "Progress Day": March 4th (say it out loud). His son has joined the business now and manages investments. If I had a dime to invest, I'd give it to him.

Recently when the owner of a new storefront tax business approached me on my new main street with a coupon for discounted tax prep, I just smiled and said "I'm all finished!" In fact, I've been finished for so long it always amazes me that people still have not filed their tax returns for last year by midnight, April 15.

Thank you, Digby, for posting this

http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2010/04/working-together.html

In case you're wondering, it's about jobs and fairness and cleaning up the mess wrought over the past decade by greed and selfishness. Not funny? Sorry. But it's necessary. Please read this.

Goody...more bargains!!

All my favorite cooking websites are having humongous sales these days. Here's a small appliance sale ad I got today:

OUR FIVE FAVORITE COUNTERTOP APPLIANCES!!
Blender:$548.95
Coffee Maker: $305.00
Mixer: $349.95
Food Processor: $298.95
Toaster Oven: $129.95

Yup...that's right. 500 bucks for a blender, 300 for a coffee maker ON SALE! Thank God we have Starbucks!!! With SALE prices like these, we can't afford to make our own coffee!

Who needs Conan, Dr. Oz, or Oprah? We've got Darlene!!!

Darlene emailed this valuable and timely advice to her subscribers yesterday. I'm sorry I didn't post it immediately, but I had to make sure I had enough supplies for the week.

Please share this with the important women in your life:


Important Women's Health Issue:

Do you have feelings of inadequacy? Do you suffer from shyness? Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist about Margaritas.

Margaritas are the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions.

Margaritas can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything..

You will notice the benefits of Margaritas almost immediately and with a regimen of regular doses you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live.

Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living, with Margaritas.

Margaritas may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Margaritas. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.

Side effects may include: Dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing karaoke!

IMPORTANT WARNINGS NOT ON THE LABEL: The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you are whispering when you are not. The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them. The consumption of Margaritas may cause you to think you can sing. The consumption of Margaritas may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

Please share this with other women who may need Margaritas.

Darlene knows....it's never too late to be funny!

I wanna bangerbur*!

It's Saturday afternoon, the day before Easter Sunday. I think they called this Holy Saturday, who knows? What I remember most about it was that the Lenten fast used to end at noon on this day. My dad would have a good sandwich for lunch, with probably a glass of beer and a cigarette, too. He used to give up smoking and drinking for Lent every year, but at noon today, it was back to his normal diet. I just remember feeling THRILLED about it, even though nothing much culinary changed for me. I was just glad for my dad. Mom was, too. He suffered the most from fasting, though I think he could have done ok without the food. It was the highball before dinner and the cigarettes that he missed.

He wasn't a big drinker...he saved his quarters in a little metal bank that looked like a book, and when he had enough, he'd buy another bottle of Jim Beam. He paid for his Pall Malls the same way.

There's been no fasting in Casa Maria Elena for many years, and I quit smoking in 1979. So this is simply remembrance of things past. One thing that used to amuse me about Canon Law was the fact that you could get around just about any church rule with it. For example, if you were fasting, you could still drink as much as you wanted--tea, coffee, water, and yes, beer and booze, too. And if you were drinking an alcoholic beverage, you could have a snack so that you didn't get drunk. And Bob's your uncle....(in my children's case, true!)

But it just occurred to me that i really, really WOULD like a hamburger right now. I don't fast for spirichal reasons, but I'm laying off meat cuz it's a) so expensive and b) i can't afford it. Hmmmm.... Maybe a nice turkey burger?????

*This is what our small neighbor Jeffy Berger used to call this delicacy.

Hub Man!!!

Germany bus is on the far side of Dupont Circle--to the right of the fountain and beyond the folks in red and white.

Germany bus is going north on Connecticut Avenue....

Hub Man and little Mr. Bendy.

Who says DC is not full of promise? The German Embassy here has sponsored a "Spot the Bus" contest for a couple of years. The first contests awarded winners a chance to fly to Germany. This year, the winners (those who spot the bright blue "Germany bus" on the streets of DC and send the contest a photo of it) get their choice of "German gear."

I picked the techie option, and I collected my prize at the PO today:
A little bendy toy and something they call "Hub Man"--you plug it into your USB slot, and it provides FOUR slots for things you might want to power via your computer.

I wish they still gave away trips to Germany. My mother was born in Germany, and lately I've begun to want to see where she arrived on the planet. Hmm....

Anyway, the first two photos above have glimpses of the Germany Bus--by the time I got my blackberry out and ready to take a photo, the bus in both shots was far away. But close enough to win Hub Man and the little bendy figure.